As a first-grade teacher, my wife Lisa is adept at drawing information out of children, although at this age their communication skills are limited. She is naturally gifted in communicating, especially with children.
She and I have discussed that there are different strategies or tactics which should be employed, not just with first-grade children, but with children of all ages. Using the right phrases, questions, and attitude will get them to enjoy telling you about their day. It can even become a game. At times in our family, our children knew the routine and would run right through it after school before we would even prompt them. They would tell us the basic information, and then we would delve deeper into the “unchartered” territory. Strategies like this can dramatically open the communication channels throughout the entire family.
For example, if you say to your child when they enter the house after school, “How was school today?” you will limit your opportunities to learn much about what happened that day. That is because they can simply say, “Okay” or “Fine.”
Contrast that with a probing question like, “What was the best thing and the worst thing that happened to you at school today?” Do you see the difference in the depth of the question and the corresponding answer?
Another example would be the question, “Do you like your teachers?” which leads to a yes or no answer. But if you present the question as, “Who do you think is your best teacher and why?” then the question demands an explanation.
So what you are seeking are more open-ended questions, where dialogue can begin. Another question of this type is, “Who are your five best friends in school?” When this is
answered, you can probe deeper by saying, “What is it you like most about (the friend they named best)?” You could even continue with, “What is it about the other friends that you like?” These are a few ideas to get you started. But if you brainstorm, I’m sure you can come with other ways to make discussing school with your children an enjoyable, meaningful experience.