Therefore I stationed some of the people behind the lowest points of the wall at the exposed places, posting them by families, with their swords, spears and bows. After I looked things over, I stood up and said to the nobles, the officials and the rest of the people, ‘Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your brothers, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes’” (Nehemiah 4:13-14). Nehemiah had received news about the dilapidated shape of Jerusalem’s walls and that the gates had been burned down. He was distressed and wept upon hearing this news, and so he prayed to God.
He was cupbearer to the king, and when the king saw the sadness on his face, he asked him what was wrong. Again he prayed before answering the king. But then he asked King Artaxerxes to send him with men and supplies to rebuild the wall.
Nehemiah found favor from the Lord and was able to direct the rebuilding of the wall quickly, and had it built up to half of its entire height. Then the governor of nearby Samaria and some Ammonites heard of this and were going to attack Jerusalem to stop the building of the wall. So Nehemiah devised a great plan for how to guard against the oncoming attack. Again he led his men in prayer first. Then he thought that rather than just fighting to protect the wall, he should make it personal. In doing this, he gave the men a personal goal to fight for; the safety of their wives, sons, and daughters. Just as God called Nehemiah to rebuild the wall, he calls fathers and mothers to fight for each other and to fight for their children.
Certainly in marriage we all face times that are challenging, where we want to take the easy way out and give up. But what if we gave up in our business life each time we encountered a little resistance? God doesn’t call us to be people who quit when things get tough but to be overcomers.
We can all be overcomers if we draw on the strength of Jesus Christ, who is alive within us if we have a personal relationship with Him. We just need to dwell on what is at stake. God has strategically placed us as fathers or mothers, and we need to fight for each other and for our children.
For me, and for many fathers and mothers, there come heated times as parents when our children (usually as teenagers) will rebel against our authority. They will say things to us, which are hurtful and untrue. But what are we saying to them if we just give up — that they aren’t worth fighting for? No.
Our children want us to be like Christ and show them, unconditional love, regardless of the situation. They want to see us fight for their love, even if it isn’t shining through to us at the particular situation we are in.
Our children, deep down, no matter what they say or do, know that we brought them into this world and that we have a special connection to them on all levels –spiritual, emotional, and physical.
If we give up on them, what does that say about what the rest of the world will do? Our children are watching our example to see what value we place on them, how far we are willing to go for them. Are you up to the challenge?
So continue to pursue a relationship with your children, no matter what they have done. Continue to show your unconditional love to them. Continue to show they matter to you. You will be amazed how God rewards you for your diligence and determination.
As fathers there is an additional responsibility we have, of fighting for our wives and to fight for family cohesiveness in times of division. We are the pursuers from the time before we are married, and it continues into our marriage. We have the responsibility to pursue our wives and never give up.
The Bible tells us to love our wives as Christ loved the church. And if we love them that deeply, we will go to any lengths to fight for them and fight for our children. So let us persevere and not grow weary, but fight in all occasions for our family.